Having the will to forgive is a major part of the process. How many times must we forgive? The answer is ~ over and over until we are free! There is a wonderful book called, Radical Forgiveness, written by Colin Tipping and I highly recommend it.
Here’s the link to his website, http://www.radicalforgiveness.com
Forgiveness is a courageous endeavor! It is also the most freeing gift we can give ourselves. Finding a process to examine ourselves for the places where we are holding pain, grudges, judgment of others or ourselves is powerful and productive. It isn’t easy.
Forgiveness is not a simple act or just a phrase used randomly or lightly. Of course it can be said without thought; as we so often hear it used, ‘oops, sorry’ or ‘oh dear, can you forgive me?’ But then the person does the same thing over and over again; which gives you the sense that they didn’t mean it when they said they were sorry in the first place. If that is the sense you have, you likely will begin to resent the person and their empty words.
It has been my experience that when someone does that repeatedly to me, then there is something in me that needs forgiving.
Let’s be clear on this aspect of forgiving though…forgiving does not mean we endorse the behaviour, or that we like it, or that we want it to continue. It doesn’t even mean we want the person in our lives. It does not mean that whatever happened was acceptable.
It means that we let go of our attachment to that memory. Whenever we have a wound against us, from another, or ourselves, our ego mind holds that memory and stores it in the cells of our body. When the behaviour is repeated, the cell memory is reinforced. We may create a layer of fat around ourselves to protect from more pain. Fat cells store toxins. That is one of the reasons weight loss that is too fast, can create more health problems as the toxins are released with the fat and flood the body. We need to release toxins slowly, with proper hydration and rest.
It is the same with releasing memories of hurts or experiences that have been stored in our body. Some of those memories stored in the cells are not even from this lifetime. They can be inherited from our parents, and their parents. So letting go of those painful memories can be difficult, but also very liberating.
‘Forgive but don’t forget’ is often a saying we hear. I’m inclined to disagree with that saying. If we instill in ourselves a will to never forget, we have to hold that belief somewhere in our body. It is holding all those memories that creates such incredible weight to carry around! I prefer to forgive and let go! It is the letting go that really and truly provides freedom and lightness.
We have been trained to accept that if we do not remember those old patterns or wounds that they will indeed repeat. If we look at our collective history we can see where forgetting might have helped us evolve a lot faster.
When we look at family feuds, or countries that have been battling for hundreds of years, we ask ourselves how did that start? What was the reason behind the conflict? Usually no one knows the exact reason. What they know is what they were told by their parents, who were told by their parents and so on. So three or four or more generations continue to fight, to hate and to use incredible amounts of energy, not to build but rather to destroy their perceived enemy. The enemy who did what to them? They know not. They only know how to identify the enemy by what they were taught.
It is the basis behind racial intolerance, political battles, prejudice, discrimination and so much pain. It is the not forgetting that instills the fear. We fear those who we do not know and those who we feel may threaten our right to life. Forgiving and forgetting will allow us to move on into the life we truly deserve, without all the baggage. Especially the baggage that wasn’t ours to begin with!
There is nothing wrong with knowing that touching a hot stove will create a burn, we don’t have to hold onto a memory in order to prevent ourselves from touching it in the future. As we let go of the old baggage, we make room for the new and wonderful experiences. We allow the new potential to be revealed. We find out who we really are without all the stories.
For giving is giving before we get so that we are open to receiving!
It is my belief, and one shared by some others, that we have many lifetimes. During those many other lifetimes we have probably hurt others and been hurt many times. At this point in history, it is likely that we’ve all killed each other, or oppressed, or destroyed something that didn’t belong to us. If we truly want to evolve, to create peace on earth we are going to have to learn to forgive each other and ourselves. We are going to have to get past the past and forgive in order to create something new and exquisite.
Men will have to forgive women and women forgive men collectively in order to bring the Divine feminine and Divine masculine into balance. We’ve been living on a planet with an overload of negative masculine energy that has oppressed all of us, not only women! Men cannot be who they really are, while they deny women the right to life. Women cannot be who they truly are, while they attempt to fit themselves into the tiny boxes created by negative masculine energy. As long as one gender believes itself to be superior to the other, we are all denying ourselves the ability to create. It takes both masculine and feminine energy to create. If we keep remembering the past conditioning and accept the old ways, we will never find our way to what we can really be! Forgiving is the key to our personal happiness and freedom as well as our collective happiness and freedom.
Forgiveness is by far the most powerful tool we have; I highly recommend its use in our daily lives. When we truly forgive, we change something in ourselves and no longer attract the experiences that surround that wound. It is my belief that as long as we have the wound we will keep repeating it; I know that sounds strange, but it is what I see happening. As long as we disempower others and ourselves by seeing the victim in us, we will keep being the victims. Further to that, I understand that this is the way Source is helping us to heal. The great masters have spoken many times about the power of forgiveness. There must be something to it? I suspect we were never meant to hold all those memories, but our ego mind doesn’t accept that.
Our ego mind has only one thought, ‘survival at all costs’! Now an important point here is that the ego is not going to survive. It is the only part that is going to die with the physical body. So it is right. When we give up the body the ego goes too, but the rest of us, the part that is really ‘us’, lives eternally. My question is why do we allow our ego to run the show? A healthy ego is important for our physical survival, yes, that is true, so we need to pay attention to developing a healthy ego, but not to allow it to be in charge of our journey. That is why meditation is such a wonderful tool. Using it can allow you to create a healthy ego, to identify your wounds, forgive yourself and others and hear your inner wisdom. That is true freedom.
Read more Using Meditation
Filed under: Meditation Or Energy Work
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