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How Can You Know When You are Not Claiming Your Own Power?
An Excerpt from the tools/insights section of the upcoming book (2015) by Catherine Whelan Costen (©Catherine Publishing)

Claim Your Power.001Life can be an interesting balance between other people’s power and our own. We all have a right to our own power and our own uniqueness. Often we learn in childhood to give away our power.

Sometimes that pattern of giving away our power follows us into adulthood. We may have been overpowered physically, emotionally or mentally as a child. We may have decided that giving it away was simpler than fighting to hold onto it. Whatever the reason, many adults struggle to claim what is theirs by Divine accord.

If you are not sure if this is what you are doing, take a look at your life. Here are a few areas that may ring a bell for you.
• Do people often claim they said something that you actually said?
• Do people take credit for your accomplishments?
• Do people seem to walk right over you even in your own workplace or home?
• Do people not seem to respect you?
• Do you change your opinion when confronted with a differing one?
• Are you the frequent victim of a bully?
• Do you find yourself begging to be heard, or validated or accepted?

Those are some of the clues that you may have given up your power or allowed it to be taken. When we don’t claim our own power, it’s as if it’s in a kind of ‘common space’ and open to whoever wants to claim it. We need to set healthy boundaries for ourselves in order to claim what is rightfully ours. In my experience it is like putting a lock on the front door. If we don’t own what is ours, somebody else often will.

We may have been taught that we weren’t good enough, not worthy of respect or even worthy of our place on the planet; but that is a lie. We are all unique and perfect, even in our imperfections. Nobody has the right to your power but you.
Claim it! Respect it and respect yourself. The world will not validate you, nor respect you if you do not do it first.

Claiming your power is not about becoming aggressive or abusive to anyone else. It’s about being so confident in your right to be, that you are capable of accepting rejection without taking it personally. It’s about honouring what does belong to you, your work, your home, your name, your body etc., that you never allow anyone to disrespect it, abuse it or claim it.

*the insight I have learned in this exploration is that the only reason someone would try to claim your power, is that they don’t believe they are enough on their own. So it’s an interesting situation when you can see that we each have enough and there is no need to steal from another; yet we often do. When we believe that there is limited resources and live in that fear based mentality, we often feel we are not enough. Changing our beliefs can and often does change our lives.

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